Wednesday, January 30, 2013

This is a Stop on my Journey Up to God


As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God.  My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?  Psalm 42:1-2

MY LONG AWAKING

There was a time when Religion was just forced hours in Sunday school. Jesus was just another tale the teacher told. I didn't think about it or any of the other stories. I only thought about why I was stuck having to go to the church every Sunday morning.
Eventually I was beyond the age where anyone could force me to church and I began to explore religions on my own. I went thither and yon, mainstream Protestant to Unitarian to the Ethical Society. I found something unsatisfying in each because I was looking for a god in my image, not a God who made me in His.
I almost became a Roman Catholic because I liked all the ritual. I was caught up in attending daily mass, saying rosary beads and doing the Stations of the Cross. I spent time learning all the doctrine of that belief, but on the night of interview for membership, the priest stood us (my wife and I) up, and that ended interest there.
I then believed Buddhists had it right. That seemed a logical approach, but somehow I turned away from Zen and all positive-thinking religion for a darker world, one of the occult and Anton LaVey's brand of Satanism. Throughout this period I had been meeting or corresponding with ministers, arguing they were hypocrites and challenging them on their beliefs. I don't know what effect I had on them, but eventually I rejected any spiritual or supernatural philosophies and became simply an Atheist.
Until in 1975 when I became a Christian. I have explained how that happened in earlier posts. Oh, I've committed sins many times since, but I stand firmly a Christian, not perfect, just forgiven. 

HOW THIS TRIP BEGAN
In my essay on Sheep and Goats (Seriousness Series}, I told how I was removed from a church membership I had held for two decades. This forced me to examine where I was spiritually and I found myself lacking, coasting, content in the conceit of "being saved" and neglecting just about everything on the rationalization I had "paid my dues" for thirty years. How foolish. How dangerous.
I bought a new study Bible and a Chronological Bible and began daily readings and devotions. I got back to thinking about Scripture, not just viewing the words. Late last year, I found a new church and have grown steadily more active within it. 
In the spring of this year (2008), my friend from childhood to this day, began urging me to do a Blog, as he had done for some time. (My friend's main blog is called "Retired in Delaware".  We share a common background and agree on many things, but he would be first to tell you that on religion and some other things we are worlds apart.)
To be honest, I resisted. I didn't see the point. I could write whatever in my computer, why do a Blog? But he persisted and to shut him up, I started a Blog. I didn't want to just keep a journal or diary. Then I thought I would use it to explore my Christianity and perhaps it would also reach others who were seeking and raise their curiosity about Christ. However, I really didn't think anyone would read it other than my friend, and myself or perhaps, a few others I might tell.

I was wrong and much to my incredulity; my Blog was viewed all across this country and around the world. I heard from others, followed others regularly and there are those who follow me. I have heard from lost relatives and relatives I never knew.  
But "Night Writing in the Morning Light" remains what I say in its subtitle: "musings and ruminations of my personal journey to God". The rest of the subtitle comes from Psalm 42:8

By day the LORD directs his love,
at night his song is with me— 
       
a prayer to the God of my life.

WHAT I WANT YOU TO KNOW
What I write is my own personal exploration on this journey. I'm trying to clarify what I believe, understand the Word of God and draw closer to the Lord. I am just an ordinary man, not a theologian.  I'm not trying to be doctrinaire in anyway. What I write is what I believe, but I can't claim it’s correct. I respect totally those who disagree; I hope they will do the same for me. Keep in mind it is my opinion.  I try to keep my mind open and draw my own conclusions from Scripture. I will research background, check source words in the original language and look up something if it puzzles me or doesn't seem to fit, but I don't consult or rely heavily on commentaries
I don't involve myself in debates. I did when I was young, but when I was young I knew everything with total certainty. Now that I am a senior citizen, I know one thing with certainty, which is how very little I do know. I pray every day for wisdom when I read the Scriptures and that I am faithful when I write. 

WHY DID I WRITE THIS ESSAY
Normally I write on a subject that is either on my mind at the moment. Sometimes I am inspired to write on a subject by something I read.
I am not disputing anything anyone has said. I don't want anyone to think I am. This is an area where devout, true Christians hold many different views. It is an area that doesn't change the core values and beliefs of Christianity, that God created all, that Christ came as a Savior of us for our sins, died on the cross for all who would accept Him and rose, appeared to many witnesses and ascended into Heaven, and will return someday for the Church and to bring about the judgment of the world.
If I were talking to a skeptic or seeker or non-Christian, I wouldn't even bring this subject up. If they did, I would try to move them off such a discussion onto the basic Gospel. I have found if you are with someone who has doubts discussing certain subjects can be a stumbling block. One question can lead to another to another to another and in the end the Gospel is simply lost in never-ending questions that are side issues. Winning an argument on how much time God spent creating, who Cain married, how the sun could have stopped for a day, and so forth are worthless if Christ is never discussed and a soul is lost.
On the other hand, as a Christian, I do not think we can dismiss these questions lightly. We are told "all Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work." II Timothy 3:16-17 
It doesn't say some Scripture; it says "all". I believe all Scripture is the Word of God and was reveled by God for us to study and try to understand. As to the six days of creation and the one day of rest, I have been moving more and more to believing they were literal days.

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